My Fellow Splatter Islanders;
It's the end of 2025. A time to reflect on the paths we took, the changes our lives have had, that the absolute nonsense we dodged. While some people may have been better at dodging nonsense than others, no one who appeared in Splatter Island this year was able to do so, especially this month's release, Jacob the Philosopher. Let's see what messes he got in to:
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Get the Episode and three (3) OneShots, and get 10% off. The Bundle is available in ZIP and PDF with links format, so those who have difficulty with opening ZIP files can still access all the files in the bundle! |
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Meet Jacob. He’s a philosopher. He knows a lot of words, but “concise” isn’t one of them. On Splatter Island, he gets to answer the age old question, Does the pie hit the face, or does the face hit the pie? Scene contains: 20 pies 2 slimes |
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What does it mean to win? What does it mean to lose? What does it mean to get pied? These are all questions Jacob has to ponder as he wins more money, loses more dignity, and gets more pies. Scene contains: 3 Pies |
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Jacob reads his treatise: On Bullsfit. Most people think bullsfit is synonymous with a lie. Jacob parses the subtle details between a statement with the intent to deceive and a statement that doesn’t care, because the authority it’s said with is the lie. And he is not the kind to use a single syllable more than necessary when he can use two. Scene contains: 1 Slime |
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What is knowledge? Is it a fact you pick up and tuck away for later? Or is it a series of interconnected points that are used to unlock a deeper truth? According to Jacob, it’s the latter, and in On Knowing, he’ll explain how his definition is more right by using words so uselessly big that you’ll forget what he was trying to say in the first place. Scene contains: 1 Slime |
That's all we have for this month. Join us next month when we kick off 2026 by seeing what the future holds with Evan 3!
Until then,
Thank you for supporting PieRSquared Media!